现在很伤心。 现在很难过。 现在很负罪。
我也不知道自己在较真什么， 没有目的的较真。 什么叫赢什么叫输?
我知道他也一定被我伤透了心 所以到现在都没有开电话。
我想说 对不起。

他 曾经问我 是不是 “我过的不好 你就安心了”
现在想想 我真的很自私 很苛刻 很不是东西。

在气头上的时候 什么都听不进去。 感受不到什么是容忍 什么是对我一片真心。
没在生气的时候 明明知道 人家就是全世界最能忍你的人了 对你好成这样 你还要什么呢?
我现在也是真怕我自己了。 真怕。 怕变成世界上的另一个爱我的人。
我还能改变么?
这样下去 对谁好呢? 对谁都不好。

我一定要改。 即使什么都挽回不了 我也要改。一定。

两天我都有生气。 也都有很不错的回忆。
纪念我这个老女人的21岁生日。

happy birthday.

PS. the first birthday in the US.

我需要有个人客观的给我分析一下。
但是我发现我找不到这样一个人。
以后也很难找到。
他妈的。:(

我现在想, 等我4年学上完。 我就回安徽财贸学院当老师去。唉。 还是得找关系的事。
然后当两年老师 再去好好找个工作。
等我有个画廊的时候。 我估计我就跟我妈现在的年纪差不多大了。

嘿嘿嘿嘿。 我就喜欢瞎想。

10分钟前刚打工回来。
马上泡脚睡觉。

知道我的人， 我干什么 他们都知道。
不知道我的人， 我也没必要把我的事一件件记下来 让他们费脑子了。
我自己也懒 你们都知道…

感恩节， 我想我还是不出门了吧。 太遥远的事。 生死未卜。
12月的目标。 600。 终极目标。定心。

在美国挺好的。除了学习比国内累很多很多。 生活质量还是蛮好的。 好不容易减了点体重，眼看又要彪回去了。 每天的生活呢。 就是上课，图书馆，游泳 和周5的 coral ridge mall. 主要是去Target屯点货，每天好回来弄点东西吃。图书馆， 我在海大是从来不泡的。 过来以后还是觉得在图书馆做作业比较能静下来。 压力还蛮大的， 每天早上几乎也都想着期末的考试醒过来，晚上想着考试睡觉。 除了偶尔心情不会很好， 现在想想 这样的生活还蛮有趣的。 躲不掉的事， 那就等着它来了。

这边吃饭还蛮贵的。 垃圾般的中国盖饭， 跟人民币一个价。 恶心。 所以基本最近都在吃韩国餐馆。 中午休息就一个小时， 所以只能随便凑合了。 早上还蛮好的。 Iowa house 还有早餐供应， 蛮美式的。对了对了。cereal 现在成了每天必备。 在国内 我绝不吃得东西，现在就像米饭一样习惯。 哈哈。 鸡蛋， 牛奶这些，我在国内几年几乎没碰过的东西， 现在也成必备。 营养过剩。 XDDDD

从上上个星期开始 。我找到了 field house。 所以， 几乎1.3.5 晚上都会去游泳。 这是我唯一的娱乐活动。

每天上课。 早也就开始习惯了吧 我想。 除了每天想到做作业会有抵触情绪 但又不得不完成之外。 上课还是蛮好的。 听见的看见的 就都变成我的了。 大概以前是汉语，所以会觉得无所谓。 现在是英文， 每句话都要听的懂。 所以一节课50分钟。 还怪费脑子的。 不过 现在 我习惯了。

不知不觉都来Iowa 一个多月了。 每天早上起来， 回想做梦的情景， 还是蚌埠和海口。 早上起来就想掉眼泪的事情， 很经常发生。 描述的还怪可怜的。 Q几乎每天都开，盼望着和熟悉的人能多聊两句。 更好笑的是，出来之前只花了2个小时收拾箱子，所以很多东西都没带。 前两天在ebay 买了个视频， 激动的不得了。 见到亲爱的人们就要视频。 我空虚，我承认。

对了，上个星期天晚上有 tornado的警报。 然后我和室友就极快的时候箱子。 撂进bathroom。 然后我们跑去 basement。 还蛮多人在那的。 据说前2年有一次 tornado 卷进downtown 把 车子 房子 树都卷飞了。 可怕。 很庆幸，这次的tornado 只从旁边卷了一下就走了。 所以， 我其实没有见到， 我也不想见到。 不然我会后悔跑Iowa 来了。

没什么好写的了。 过会泡澡去了。 对了 这算也是我每天比较喜欢的活动之一，relax。 嘿嘿。

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　Pisces Horoscope for December 2008
　　
　　
　　By Susan Miller
　　
　　
　　
　　Exciting career progress will be evident as December opens. Mars will be shining a brilliant beacon of light in your reputation and career sector, making you quite the celebrity in your company or industry. Mars is now in a rare visit to your tenth house of honors, awards, achievement, and fame, so any career spot you win or special publicity you receive would represent a big advancement in your stature. You will be noticed now, and although as a Pisces you are often shy about being in the limelight, try to enjoy it this time – you’ve worked hard and earned the rewards you are getting now.
　　
　　
　　You’ve not seen professional acclaim similar to this in two years, because it’s been that long since Mars last visited this house. You are now about to start a new professional cycle, and your prospects for success in 2009 and 2010 could not be better.
　　
　　
　　If you want a promotion, ask your boss for one now when you are most likely to get it. Even if you think your ambitions are fairly obvious, it would be worth talking over your future in the firm with your boss now.
　　
　　
　　If you have been (or will be) interviewing for a new job elsewhere, you will impress VIPS – keep the faith! Some jobs take weeks or month to finalize. What matters is that you begin the interview process now. If you had a major interview for an important position at the end of November, your timing was perfect and chances are that this particular opportunity will be offered to you. If you have not had any talks, try to schedule an interview for a new job immediately.
　　
　　
　　If you are self-employed, as December opens, present ideas and pitch new business – you have a wonderful chance of winning approvals. Praise from present clients should be strong and flattering. Whether you are employed by others or work for yourself, you also have a good change of being written up in the press, and when you read what was written about you, you will be pleased. Life can’t always be this sweet, so when planets are THIS cooperative, take full advantage. It is so rare to see the kind of planetary power you have this month!
　　
　　
　　The first week of December will be your strongest for these types of career matters, thanks to the appearance of a key new moon that fell on November 29 and that still will be exerting a strong energy flow as the month opens. As you move farther and farther away from the new moon of November 29, you begin to lose light. Take your first steps early on.
　　
　　
　　December offers you special advantages for another reason. This is the only month of all of 2008 that holds no retrograde planets. (In 2007, there were actually no months that held this remarkable advantage.)
　　
　　
　　A retrograde planet is a sleeping planet, and one that is not emitting its best and brightest light. We depend on the strong, robust energy of each planet to help us navigate our way through life, and when we are without it, we find that things don’t fit together quickly and easily. This month is rare in that all planets will be marching to the same quick-paced tune!
　　
　　
　　Any activity goes better when planets move at strong, direct orbit as they will this month. While it is true that Saturn will turn retrograde on December 31, this barely “counts” because it is unlikely that you will be doing anything of vital importance on this day, when most people have at least part of the day off. For all practical purposes, December will be your ideal month to move ahead with vigor!
　　
　　
　　When Uranus in Pisces turned to direct speed late last month on November 27, it marked an important and happy turning point for you. Uranus, the planet of surprise and creativity, has been retrograde for the past five months, since mid-June, but now will be in the right position to help you. Uranus will not turn retrograde again until July 1, 2009, and that is more than enough time to for you to make a success of your mission. When a major planet turns direct and is in your sign, that’s major news. You should see a quickening pace and lots of progress on goals both personal and professional, at long last!
　　
　　
　　Now we need to talk about a monster full moon due December 12. I bring it up only so that you will be prepared and not feel suddenly broadsided by events.
　　
　　
　　This full moon will emphasize your family and home life. Uranus will oppose that full moon, so you are likely to have news come up that you would never have expected. Keep your cell phone powered up, and have your office, friends, and family aware of your general schedule should anyone need to find you.
　　
　　
　　There are many ways this full moon may play out, and I will offer a few of the many possibilities. Your landlord may announce he has sold the building and all the tenants have to vacate their apartments within a short time. Your roommate may suddenly announce she’s moving out soon to get married. You may have a problem with the building’s structure – the roof may leak or the electricity may be faulty – and you will need to get things fixed pronto. Whatever news you receive, it appears not to be something you were expecting to hear.
　　
　　
　　Alternatively, you may become concerned about the welfare or health of your mother, father, or grandparent, or even your own physical state.
　　
　　
　　No matter what comes up, news may temporarily make you feel kicked off kilter. Be careful not to have too much on your plate between December 10 and 15. I realize that is easy to say, but not that easy to follow at holiday time. Your quick attention will be needed to deal with whatever comes up, however, so keep that in mind. Full moons don’t just deliver news, but almost always require a response, too.
　　
　　
　　With Uranus and Saturn both sending harsh vibes to that full moon and Pluto in wide mathematical degree in opposition, it will seem that everyone will need you at once. Your career will be quite demanding then too, and a partner (whether in business or personally) will not know how to help you, and may actually wind up becoming more of the problem than the solution.
　　
　　
　　Your friends will be gems, however, so if you need support or advice, you can rely on them wholeheartedly with the knowledge they will have your best interests in mind. You won’t have many options, so facing the reality of the situation will be the first step. Having said that, there always are more options than the ones you see initially. Keep thinking and playing with the challenge, for you will see more possibilities as you look. With Mercury in fine position to other planets in the last week of December, an idea may come up that proves to be workable and the very best solution. You may wonder why you didn’t think of it sooner.
　　
　　
　　Protect your health all month, particularly at the time of the full moon, December 12 plus or minus three days. Don’t do anything that would bring harm to bones or teeth. For example, perhaps that would not be the time to go skiing. Try to remain calm at this time, too – your nerves may be frayed, and you may feel like too many demands and too much news is being hurled at you at once. It will be a draining time, so plan to eat right and get enough sleep to cope.
　　
　　
　　If your birthday falls on March 11 or within five days of this date, try to take advice to heart. I am so sorry to report it could turn out to be a trying time.
　　
　　
　　Fortunately a full moon will require a swift response, with almost no time to deliberate. You will announce your plans and move forward. I am glad this full moon does not occur any later in the month, for everyone, of every sign, will get a chance to regroup and calm down in time to enjoy the holiday.
　　
　　
　　Now, here’s the sweetest surprise of the month – the loving collection of six planets in highly compatible Capricorn to fill your house of friendship, events, and fun. Once you get to December 21 when the Sun enters Capricorn, your whole mood will lift and you’ll soon see a truly dazzling holiday is in store for you.
　　
　　
　　Mercury rules your house of home, and throughout the last third of the month, Mercury will be in fine conversation with a number of powerful planets. This tells me that although news may initially rattle you, if you stay calm, you can have a good ending by the time the month is over. Actually, a friend may be quite helpful at this time by providing the right solution.
　　
　　
　　With so many planets stacking up in your friendship house, it looks like you will be invited to a number of swanky parties. This year is really special, and even if you protest and say you never go to parties, all I can say is, get your outfits ready anyway!
　　
　　
　　Although all the action will take place from December 21 to 31, there is one day that comes as the month opens that I would like you to circle on your calendar.
　　
　　
　　That date will be December 1 when Jupiter will align with Venus, a rare and dazzling aspect that will bring you a pampering, fun event that you won’t want to miss. This may be a career-related gathering, or one that is purely personal and fun – either would bring a touch of luxury. You need a night out – this could be your first one of the season.
　　
　　
　　Once you get to December 21, the heavy-duty emphasis on your career that was so evident since November 16 will begin to subside and you will be able to devote yourself fully to the joys of the season.
　　
　　
　　On December 24, when Mercury will be in superb angle to Uranus, you are due to get a surprise message that thrills you from a friend or parent. You may also receive a beautiful and touching gift from that person. Yet the affection a friend or relative has for you will be what you value most, more than any material thing could ever bring you. As a Pisces, you understand this of course, and may feel reminded of just how lucky you are to have this person in your life.
　　
　　
　　On December 26, a partner may be quite supportive and together you can build a plan for the future, thanks to the interplay of Mercury with Saturn. If you need a day to sign a contract, this would be your day to do so, as Saturn will see to it that any promises you make to one another will be promises that are kept. If you need to get a marriage license, this would be a great day to do so!
　　
　　
　　On Saturday, December 27, the new moon in your eleventh house of friends will ratchet up your level of socializing and fun even more! Simultaneously, Venus will conjoin with Neptune, which is one of the most glamorous and romantic aspects possible. Neptune rules Pisces, so this conjunction will have your name written all over it. Get ready for a bewitching evening, and more to come as the week continues!
　　
　　
　　The new moon will also arrive on this day, December 27, and will take the energy of the prevailing six planets in Capricorn and bring it together so that you can see and feel it clearly, in an exciting way. Expect outstanding opportunity and happiness to stem from the kindness of friends and by participating in groups that you may belong to as well.
　　
　　
　　If you have been considering joining a club, whether a social club or professional organization, do so in the week that follows this new moon, December 27, for superb rewards await you from your membership if you do. Truly, don’t put this off – this aspect comes once every 12 years, so there would be something special to be gained from becoming a member, advantages you can’t quite see at this time.
　　
　　
　　This holiday season you may also decide to help a charity by doing volunteer work, and if so, you would derive much pleasure from the work you do. You would also be able to demonstrate how effectively you can organize an event to produce solid results. If anyone underestimated you, with the star power you have going for you now, this person certainly won’t for long. By month’s end this naysayer will be speechless.
　　
　　
　　In all, December just brims with fun, friends, romantic episodes, and joyous feelings. Your favorite moment will come when Mercury conjoins Jupiter on December 31, which is, of course, New Year’s Eve. Wow, dear Pisces, what timing!
　　
　　
　　On this glittering evening, the moon will also be in Pisces, laying the groundwork for a perfect evening to ring in the New Year. Even if you’ve always stayed home on New Year’s, it appears you will be out and about and enjoying yourself to the fullest this year.
　　
　　
　　It appears that you’ll be invited to a rather special party, one populated with many successful and well-dressed people. The conversation will be as bubbly as the fine champagne. The food, music, and soft lighting will add to the soft and gentle mood, and make this night one to remember. With a strong emphasis in Capricorn, the party would have a lovely old-fashioned quality about it, with lots of tradition woven through it. Perhaps it will be given at a proper university club, with wood-paneled walls and stained glass windows – the building could be a landmark in the town. The mood would be cozy and romantic, for sure. This sounds like a night you won’t want to miss, dear Pisces!
　　
　　
　　If your birthday falls on February 25 or within five days of this date, you will have a double dip of fun.
　　
　　
　　No matter when your birthday happens to fall, it appears your friend will give the party on New Year’s Eve, but if not, you can also consider giving the party. If you do, everyone will be buzzing about how talented you are at hosting, and how much fun it all was.
　　
　　
　　
　　Summary
　　
　　
　　This month seems to have everything in it, and it will keep you on your toes. During the first three weeks, your career will demand almost all your attention, and rightfully so, for your successes will come quickly, one right after the other. Early December will be a great time to make career decisions. You may be interviewing for a new position or getting quite a bit of publicity for the hard work you’ve done in your career over the past two years.
　　
　　
　　A very difficult full moon, December 12, plus or minus four days, will immediately rivet your attention on your family or a home / property situation. I will not kid you – this full moon is a monster, for it will lash out at Saturn, Uranus, Mars, and the Sun. That’s a lot of planets to take on at once, and all those planets will be quite literally in four different quarters of the sky at the time. Emotion will be high, and adjusting to unanticipated events will be hard, particularly if you were born near March 11, plus or minus five days.
　　
　　
　　You will need to do your holiday preparations early so that you have a completely empty calendar at midmonth. There is no way you can handle more than that full moon – you will have to drop everything once news hits. By the time you resume your life, it will be December 17 or 18 or even later, and the pressure to get things done for the holiday will be unbearable. Be smart and get shopping, wrapping, and shipping done by the December 6-7 weekend. If you plan to put up a tree, do it that weekend. If you have family members, especially children, who are depending on you to make a holiday tradition for them, you will absolutely need to be ahead of schedule.
　　
　　
　　Still, remain optimistic. Mercury rules your home and family sector, and Mercury will be meeting with every big planet on your behalf during December’s second half. Mercury may well have good news to bring you on December 24, 26, and 31, so hang in there! This month has more twists and turns than a Hitchcock movie. As stormy as the full moon will be at midmonth, brilliant sunshine is due at month’s end, so keep the faith.
　　
　　
　　The last ten days of the month will find you surrounded by literally dozens, if not hundreds, of friends and happy people. Many will be people who adore you and who will be celebrating the arrival of the New Year with you. It will be a truly heartwarming time, when friends will show you how dearly you are loved and admired. You will have many career successes to celebrate by then, too. Lift your champagne glass and toast life. You have every reason to be excited about 2009!
　　
　　
　　Happy New Year, dear Pisces!
　　
　　
　　
　　Dates to watch for December:
　　
　　
　　Most romantic evenings: December 1, 21, 22, 24, 26-28, and 31.
　　
　　
　　Join a club or organization: December 27 plus 1 week.
　　
　　
　　A highly placed friend could be quite helpful to you: December 22.
　　
　　
　　A kind gesture of a friend surprises and touches you: December 24.
　　
　　
　　Your home or a family member may be a major concern at the full moon: December 12 (plus or minus 3 days).
　　
　　
　　If so, keep calm – the last week of December brings helpful home and family vibrations. Even though you’ll have to make a decision near December 12, you may find better solutions in a matter of days later.
　　
　　
　　Make a promise to a partner or sign a contract: December 26.
　　
　　
　　A luxurious party will be all you want it to be: December 31.

——————————————–JES————————————————–
　在12月开始， 工作会有明显的进步。火星将会发出灿烂的光芒照亮你的声望和工作区，使你在业界或者公司名声大噪。现在，火星非常难得的光顾主你荣誉，奖赏，成功，名声的第十宫。所以，在你的职业圈，赢得的名望会在反映你工作的非凡成就。你现在要注意啦，虽然双鱼座在聚光灯下时常会害羞，但是，在这个时候，请试着尽情享受你努力工作的成果和赢得的荣誉吧。
　　
　　由于上一次火星光顾然后离开的第十宫到现在已经不短时间了，所以你在最近2年内可能都没有听到业界内部或者关于这方面的赞赏了。你现在处于职业循环期的新开始，所以你的职业前途在09-10年将会取得莫大成功。
　　　　
　　　　加入你想要升迁，去告诉你的老板你是多么想要个这样的机会吧。即便你的壮志雄心是多么显而易见，它也值得你再去和你的老板沟通，争取得他对你未来仕途的认可。
　　　　
　　
　　　如果你已经（或者即将）在别处接受一个新工作的面试，你将会是重点对象，–坚持信念吧！一些工作会在几周或几个月内敲定，关键在于你现在开始这个面试的进程。假如在11月末你有一个关于重要职务的面试，这将会是个在完美的时间有个特别的机会,然后你就等着offer吧。（真的假的?这么好?）假如现在没什么关于这方面的沟通， 赶紧安排安排去面试个新工作吧！
　　
　　　　假如你自己当自己的老板，12月的开始，秀出你的想法，还有安排个新业务吧。这将会是个绝妙的机会去赢得肯定。来自委托方的赞许强烈而谄媚。无论你是为别人工作还是为自己做事，这都是你被书写进光荣篇章的好机会，当你看见你的光荣史册时，你将会快乐死。（哈哈哈！）生活不会一直这么甜美，当这些行星如此合作时，快抓住这些有利条件吧。你的这个12月，看到这些行星力量是对你是如此的帮助，实在太稀罕了。
　　　　
　　　　12月的头一个星期你面对一系列工作问题表现彪悍， 这都要感谢新月在11月29日的出现，而且这个强悍的力量会持续到这个月的开始。但是….随着11月29号新月的越来越远， 这种光芒逐渐消失。赶紧提前迈出你的步伐吧！
　　　　
　　
　　　　说12月给你特别的有利条件的另一个原因是。这是在2008年唯一一个没有行星逆行的月份。（oh.yeah !） 在2007年，事实上还真没有一个月能像这个月一样被标记一下。 （其实就是2007年12个月哪个月都有行星逆行的呗，切！）
　　　　
　　一个逆行星是一个沉睡的行星(?),这个行星不会发出它最闪耀的光芒。我们依靠每个行星强悍的力量来帮助我们贯穿于生命的航行。然而当我们没有他们的时候， 我们就会发现做事情不顺啊，不容易啊 什么的。 而这个月将非常稀罕的看见所有的行星在快节奏的调整移动.
　　　　
　　当行星移动到强势，我们的行动就会顺利，眼下它们的轨迹就是如此。但是，不得不说的是，土星将会在12.31逆行，它也几乎不能算个倒霉的事吧，当大多数人都懒散的等着新年假呢，你也不见得有多重要的事非得在这天做。就行动意图这方面来说， 12月将是个完美的月份让你充满精力去拼搏！
　　　　
　　
　　　当天王星移动在11.27日，对你意味是一个重大并且快乐的转折点。天王星，代表着惊喜与创意，从六月中开始，已经在过去逆行5个月了，但是它现在将处于一个正确的位置去帮助你。天王星在09年7月1日之前不会再逆行了，这个时间对于想把事情做成功的你来说绰绰有余了。当在你的主宫里大行星转变方向，这便是一个重大新闻。你终究将会看见个人的或者职业方面的快节奏调整和向目标靠近的重大进步。
　　　　
　　　 现在，我们需要说说关于12.12 的可怕的满月了。我提出它，只是希望你在面对突如其来的状况事能有提早的准备。
　　　　
　　 对于满月， 需要强调你注意家庭。 天王星和满月相克，所以你很可能会听到你从没预料过的事情。保持你手机在开机状态，还有让你的同事，朋友，家人了解你大致的日程安排，以便他们需要的时候能找到你。
　　　　
　　
　　　　有许多途径满月将会消失，我讲给你说一些可能性啊。你的房东会跟你说他要把房子卖了，然后你们这些租客必须在短时间内搬出去。你的室友将会对你说她马上要搬出去并且要结婚了。你也许对房屋构造有疑问—-房顶漏啊，电器不好用啊—然后你需要快速修理好。无论是什么样的消息，它都会有一些你没预料的事情在其中。
　　
　　　或者，您也可能成为关注的母亲，父亲，祖父母或外祖父母，甚至自己的福利或健康等身体状况。
　　
　　　不管什么出现，新闻可能会暂时使你感到开始失调。小心，不要有太多的计划在12月10日和15日。我认识到，说起来容易，但不容易在节日的后续时间里做到。您的注意力将快速处理的任何出现的事情，所以记住这一点。满月不只是提供新闻，但也需要一个回复。
　　　　　　
　　
　　　　随着天王星和土星一起发出粗犷的共振，它的作用与满月和冥王星在数学意义上形成的广角作用相反。因此，结果就是，看起来就像每个人都立刻需要你一样。你的职场生涯也将会相当吃力，你的合伙人（不论是商业上的还是私人的）也不知道该如何帮你，也许会以增长问题比解决方法还多而收场。
　　　　
　　朋友对你来说将会变的格外重要，所以说，假如你需要支持或者建议，你可以依靠他们，他们将会给他们所有的你最感兴趣的知识。你不需要太多选择，面对现实环境是你需要做的第一步。保持思考，接受挑战，你将会看见更多的可能性。在12月最后一个星期，随着水星和别的行星成一个不错的位置，你的蹦出的想法会被证明是可行的，而且是个很好的解决办法。而后你会怀疑你之前为什么没想出来…orz
　　
　　　　这个月， 你需要保护身体，关注健康问题。特别是在满月的时候， 12月12号之前或之后3天。别做任何可能会伤害你骨头或牙齿的事情。比如说，这个时候别去滑雪。你也许又会觉得一下子周边对你有太多需要还有太多消息传向你，所以你需要保持冷静，以防神经受损。这也是个疏通时间，所以安排好饮食和睡眠，与这个满月抗衡！
　　　　
　　 假如你的生日在3月11日或者在这日期内5天，注意下心脏问题。我很难过的告诉你， 这将会是一个艰难的时刻。
　　　　
　　 幸运的是，一个满月需要一个快速的反应，而且几乎没有时间能让你自己考虑。你需要说出你的计划而且立即执行。我很开心这个满月没有在后面的时间发生，对每个人，每个宫，都会得到一个重新整合的机会。平静下来的去享受这个假期吧！
　　
　　
　　　　水星掌管你的家庭宫，并且讲贯穿这个月最后1/3的日子。水星将会与其他一些带有强大势力的行星有个不错的交流。这预示着，虽然有些消息最初让你窘迫。但是如果你能平静下来，你在12月的结束同时会有个happy ending . 事实上，也许你的一个朋友在这个时候也会提出一个正确的解决办法帮助你。
　　
　　
　　　由于在你的主你友情的宫有许多行星出现。这看起来你会被邀请参加一些盛大的派对.。这一年的确不平常，即便你说你不会去参加这些派对，我也可以明确告诉你（不可能)，快把你的派对礼服拿出来准备好吧！
　　
　　　　　　 虽然这些将在12月21到31号发生，但是这天终究会来的，月头的时候就把它备进日程表里吧。
　　
　　　　　　 12月1号，木星和金星对齐的日子。一个稀奇的或者使你眼花缭乱的因素会使你放纵，你也不想错过有乐子的事。这也许是个职业有关的一个集合，或者也就是一个纯粹对你私人找乐子的日子。这其中关于任何一方面的行动都会让你触摸到欢乐。你需要一个夜晚出门活动，或许这还是你在这个季节的第一个外出夜…
　　
　　　　　　 一旦到了12月21号，你承担的重负会强调你的职运从11.16开始明显滑落。然后，你要做的是，尽可能的把你自己投入到这个美好的季节里去吧。
　　
　　　　　　在12.24，当水星和天王星形成一个绝佳的位置，你应该会收到来自朋友或父母的意外信息。你也许还会从那个人那里收到一个漂亮的或者感人的礼物。这些人对你的关心，比那些礼物带来的更有价值。作为一条双鱼，你肯定明白这点，继而会感觉到你生命中有这些人是多么幸运。
　　
　　　　　　 在12.26，你的合伙人可能会和你合作或者非常支持你对未来的一个计划。谢谢水星和土星的作用。假如你需要一天立合约，这天再合适不过。土星会见证你对别人的承诺和别人接受你的承诺.假如你要去领结婚证，这也是个很好的日子。
　　
　　　在12.27，星期六。新月会在主你第11宫，朋友们会提升你的社交级别，还有会让你感觉更快乐。同时，金星和海王星的联合将会产生最具魅力和最浪漫的影响。海王星掌管双鱼座，所以这次联合，会使你名气大增。准备好这个迷人的夜晚吧，随着一周继续将会有更多事情的到来。
　　　　
　　
　　　　 12.27号也是新月到来的日子。这将会对魔羯宫的6个行星聚集能量提供优势，并且会用一种意想不到的方式让你非常明确的看见或感觉到。你亲爱的朋友们和你所在的团队会带给你期望中的美妙的机会和幸福感。
　　
　　　假如你有考虑参加一个俱乐部，不论是一般的社团俱乐部或者专业组织，在新月以后的一星期做吧。12.27，如果你有参加俱乐部，这个俱乐部带来的丰厚的回报会等待着你。别拖延了，这个机会12年才一次，假如你入会成为会员，虽然你不能完全在这个时候发现有什么优势，但你肯定会得到什么特别的东西。
　　
　　　这个假期你也许会决定去做慈善或者做一些志愿者工作。假如你去做的话，你将会从这个工作中得到满足。你也会讲述你在组织一个活动中发挥的影响力，或者是产生的坚实的成果。假如有人低估你，随着行星给你的力量慢慢出现，这个人将不会再小看你。 在月末时候，这个否定你的人会闭上他的嘴。
　　
　　　　　　 总的来说，12月充满了欢乐，友情，浪漫片段。感受喜悦吧。 你最爱的时刻将会在12.31水星和木星集合的时候。也就是新年夜。啊哈~亲爱的双鱼，这个时间多么合适啊！
　　
　　　　　　 在这个灿烂的夜晚，月亮也会照亮双鱼座。这个美妙的夜晚，出门活动去吧，然后准备迎接新年。如果你常常是待在家等待新年的话，这讲预示着你应该出门好好享受这一年的最后一个夜晚。
　　
　　
　　　　　　 你将会被邀请参加一个特别的派对， 或许是上层人士的派对。想象下这个场景， 充满泡沫的香槟。Oh ~God ! 美食，音乐，迷幻的灯光会增加这温和的气氛，这个夜晚将会被你怀念。随着魔羯宫的强烈影响，这个派对可能还会有一些可爱的怀旧气氛，一些传统因素交织其中。也许会举行在一个舒适的大学俱乐部，木板墙，彩釉玻璃窗，这个建筑可能也是这个城镇的标志，当然，这里的气氛也会闲适浪漫。亲爱的双鱼，这么样的一个夜晚你将不会错过吧?
　　
　　假如你的生日在2.25（或者左右5天内）。你将会双倍沉浸在欢乐之中。
　　　　　　
　　不论你生日在何时，你的朋友都会邀你参加迎新派对。假如没有的话，你可以考虑自己办一个。如果派对是你办的，每个人都会赞你的宴客天赋。或者是告诉你他们在宴会中有多快乐。
　　
　　总结部分
　　　　
　　　　十二月份有些复杂，难以定性，鱼鱼们似乎时刻保持警醒哦~在月初的三个星期里，工作几乎牵扯了你全部的精力，理所当然，成功、业绩也会接踵而至。如果你有一些关于工作方面的决定需要做，十二月上半月是在何时不过了。可能会去面试一个新职位，或者过去两年的辛苦劳动终于得到了他人的赏识和注意。
　　　　
　　　　
　　　　双鱼将在本月12号（或者前后四天）经历一个艰难的满月，问题可能会出现在你的家庭，或者房屋以及固定资产上。我没有危言耸听哦，那几天正是土星、天王星、火星和太阳四星相冲击，然后这四个行星就会精准的进入天空四个不同的角落。届时鱼鱼们情绪高涨，但是会被卷入未曾预料的事件中，且很难适应一时的改变，特别是生于3月11号或者前后五天的双鱼们。
　　　　　　
　　　所以圣诞节假期的准备双鱼们需要提前做哦，这样月中的时候就会有一个完全的空白时间去应对满月的突发事件。因为这件事情已经耗的你精疲力尽，完全没有心思顾及其他的事情。双鱼们的生活恢复正常大概要等到17或者18号，甚至更晚些时候。在假期需要应对的事情，你甚至会有些承受不住的感觉。大概12月6 号、7号的时候就要把购买礼品、包装和邮寄这些事情都搞定。（这段和中国人不搭边，都是圣诞节的。）
　　　　
　　　　
　　　　但是双鱼们请保持积极的心态，水星掌管着代表家庭和居所的宫位，并且在十二月的下半月水星将会遇到代表双鱼座的主行星。所以它将会在12 月份的24、26号和31号带来好消息，鱼鱼们不要心急，耐下性子等待吧。双鱼的十二月份的出其不意一点不比希区柯克的电影逊色。虽然月中会阴霾不堪，但请不要丧失信心，月底就能守的云开见月明啦~
　　
　　
　　　十二月的最后十天你会发现自己不是被成百也是被几十个朋友和情绪高涨的人们所环绕簇拥着，其中不乏仰慕你的人或者是与你一起欢度新年的人们。当你感到朋友的情真意切的时候，不难想象那将是个多么温暖的时刻。届时，职场的成功也会在这一刻锦上添花。让我们一起举杯庆祝吧，双鱼们没有理由不期待2009年的到来。
　　　　
　　　　新年快乐 亲爱的双鱼
　　
　　　十二月份需要注意的日期
　　　　
　　　　最佳的浪漫日期：12月1号，21，22，24，26~28，和31号
　　　　
　　　　加入俱乐部或者一个组织：12月27或者向后顺延1周。
　　　　
　　　　朋友是你的贵人的日子，22号
　　　　
　　　　朋友的温暖给你惊喜和感动你的日子，24号
　　　　
　　　　满月的时候你需要对你的家庭成员倍加关注，12月12号，或者前后三天。
　　　　
　　　　如果事情真的发生了，一定要保持镇静，因为最后一个星期将会带来利好消息，即便你在12好附近需要做出一个决定，但是之后的日子里你可能会发现更好的解决之道。
　　　　
　　　　可以对你的搭档许诺或者签署合约的日期，是26号
　　　　
　　　　 一个盛大的宴会会在12月31号等你参加

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现在在听着陈慧娴的《人生何处不相逢》，还是昨天晚上乱翻东西时候想起来好小年纪就有听的歌。 呵呵。
然后就想起昨天的电话。 ……

很累。很艰难。 该干嘛干嘛的都没个状态。 但是，确实两个人在一起就不像一个人的时候， 现在是要勇敢承担责任的时候。不管有多困难也要克服也要坚持。哪还能像小孩子过家家一样的。大概是还没有到能把做各种事情的状态都调节的很适当的时候吧。 明明知道的不能沉迷。 可是每天还是抱着可怜的电话煲个不停。

低谷低谷。 没办法排解的问题太多， 没头绪。 不知道先拎哪件事出来解决比较容易。 结果就越堆越多。 其实真要是跳出自己的角色去看。 也没什么难解决的事。 但是，事实上， 我还是觉得太纠结了。
想的太多，又是一些无谓的事。 是，每个人都说少想点。 要知道，一旦想到什么，就会慢慢不停的想。 不会这么容易就丢下不想的。 大概都有体会过吧?

也是该写点东西自我反思下的时候了。 我看我现在就是沉溺在这种状态中不愿意爬出来，其实就抬一下脚就能迈过的坎。 我非得蒙蔽我自己 ，想方设法的逃避。 太可恶了。损人不利己!